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In light of the success of the television show Survivor, plans are quickly being put together for a Tir na nOg version of the show. Competition is expected to be fierce, as the prize is expected to be a year's free drink at Tir na nOg. (The only exception is if nOse publisher Doug E Fresh wins, in that case his tab will be cut in half.) For the show, to be broadcast on Somerville Community Access, 16 contestants will be divided into two teams--one camped at Tir na nOg, the other at PJ Ryan's. Every three days, a drinking contest will take place, with the loser having to vote one of its own out of the bar. Robert Elliott, who will play the host, has already put his money on bartender Feargal O'Toole to win. "Have you seen him drink?" Elliott asked. "The only way that guy will lose a challenge is if he sleeps through it." Mr. Elliott also suggested that Feargal's smooth ways with the ladies would keep him from getting voted out. But fellow contestant Enda Mullen disagreed--"Are you kidding? He'll go through three of them in the first day, and they won't be able to vote him off fast enough. I, on the other hand, no longer date, so I'll be completely safe." Of course, at press time, the producers had been unable to locate a single woman willing to be marooned in a bar with the male contestants, so this may not be a factor. It appears that before the show even starts, alliances are being formed, with Feargal attempting to create an "Irish Alliance" to remove non-Irish contestants one by one. Said Doug E Fresh however, "It'll never work. My "Bald Webmaster Alliance" will defeat them all!"
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The nOg's annual summer cruise, now known as the "fun cruise," was in fact deemed "fun" by the participants. Regulars, new comers, and old people gathered together in scenic Boston Harbor to celebrate another year together, and to witness what was possibly the last US appearance by the complete Johnny Come Latelies. The band, the crowd and the weather were in top form, despite the brief drizzle that prompted a lengthy Mark Clark oratory on the importance of rain gear. The usual suspects were all present, including a typically rousing set from Tom Jordan. New treats were also in store for the participants, the highlight being a ripping version of "Ride On" by a guest vocalist whose style could only be described as "Christy Moore being mugged by Led Zeppelin." As the crowd plowed through Paddy Grace's still un-replaced cases of Magner's cider, and the unfortunately needy braved the heat of the tiny restrooms, the happy day was enjoyed by all. While this cruise was possibly the most crowded yet, the upper deck capacity limit was strictly adhered to, with Paddy Grace keeping an eye on the numbers with the same skill he uses at his own place. Upon returning to the nOg, the party continued until closing, with the crowd's thirst apparently still unslaked after a long day at sea. Once again, the nOg is to be congratulated that no one was lost at sea, at least no one we know of.
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